Top Twelve Courses For Married Men (If You want A Happy Marriage)
12 – How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy – Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and
Other Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
11- How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation, and Breathing Techniques.
10 – How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays
Step by Step Slide Presentations.
9 – The Toilet Paper Roll – Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
8 – Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat
7 – Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
6 – After Dinner Dishes – Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video
5 – Loss of Identity – Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other
Hot Line and Support Groups.
4 – Learning How to Find Things – Starting With Looking In The Right
Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
3 – Real Men Ask For Directions Real Life Testimonials
2 – Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
1- Learning to Live – Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing.
Have a wonderful weekend. Be safe and keep writing.
Every hero needs a villain.
Remember the cardboard cutout dastardly villain who squeezed his handle bar mustache between his fingers while tying the damsel in distress to the railroad tracks. Those days are over.
If you are a writer and you have a great hero, there is one thing that you need; an even GREATER villain.
Today’s readers and audiences don’t expect a bad guy who is all brawn and no brains. They want a villain who challenges our hero and defeats him time and time again. This allows you to build tension. Readers want a cunning evil doer who is always two steps ahead of our protagonist.
Think of The Joker (the Heath Ledger version of course) in The Dark Knight, constantly outwitting everyone including Batman. Hannibal Lecter “quid pro quo” demands of Clarice Starling; before he led her to a serial killer (Buffalo Bill) she desperately needed to stop, all the while planning his bold escape from prison. Each bad guy absolutely brilliant yet controlled by their psychopathic desires.
To strengthen your story, give your villain a justified reason to be evil. In my yet to be published sci-fi novel/screenplay, Paradox, Mabus (villain) witnessed the slaughter of his family, now he will over protect his kingdom (his new family). Give the antagonist motivations and goals that conflict with your hero’s needs. Let them clash. The protagonist/antagonist opposing needs will provide conflict throughout your story building to a page turning finale.
This chimp loves writing antagonist and their evil deeds (and an occasional naughty).
Do you enjoy writing wicked?
Please note: My poetic friends, you are not off the hook. Do you enjoy writing wicked? (I mean wicked in all its evil and naughty connotations.)
Friends on occasion ask me, Lonely Author do you penchant poetry? Yes, people close to me use the word penchant. That demonstrates I don’t monkey around when it comes to deciding who I let into my inner circle.
After journeying through the blogosphere and reading the intriguing works of many a poet and poetess, I am inspired to dabble in poetic verse or two.
I hope I inspire you as well. (And I don’t mean to quit writing.)
50 Shades of Black and Blue
By Lonely Author
She beat me to a pulp
that’s what sadists do
kicked me over and over
til I was 50 shades of black and blue
She hit me with a bat
slammed against the window sill
oh the excruciating pain
she showed me my cable bill
Poked me in the eye
smashed my little toe
stomped on my fingers
all to prevent me from writing prose
Have a wonderful week. Hope I made you smile.
Seven billion people dead; yet his selfish heart only mourned for one.
The distraught figure dragged his body to the ledge of the mountaintop, as if he alone towed the burdens of a dying planet. He looked down on the futuristic metropolis constructed over the ashes of mankind. The alien city with its pale glass structures resembled a crystal cemetery of broken dreams.
Clutching the last remaining evidence that humans once inhabited the Earth, he groaned.
Through misty eyes, Jake Cross admired a photograph of his wife Lisa. His heart pounded against his ribs like a relentless bill collector at the door. Intolerable emptiness grew inside him like a cancerous black hole, eating away at his brittle psyche, devouring his aching soul.
He pressed the photo against his heaving chest as if her image could wipe away his pain.
Who better to console him? Lisa always neutralized his sorrows with a smile or warm embrace. Wiping the moisture from his eyes, a warm breeze caressed his skin reminding him of her gentle touch. He trembled like a virgin relishing her first kiss. Would he eventually forget the sound of her soft voice?
Jake couldn’t live like this. Earth without Lisa would be as cold and desolate as Pluto. He vowed to search for her. He needed to know if she survived. A horrifying thought crept into his mind like a swarm of stampeding centipedes. What if she suffered the same fate as the seven billion others?
He rubbed the photo against his chest with violent motions like an irritated student hoping to erase an error from a page. He preferred to cling to diminishing hope because the alternative…..
Jake shut his moist brown eyes.
It would be easier to stop breathing than to live another day without her.
- – Jake Cross is the main character of my manuscript/screenplay Paradox.
Yes, I do.
Remember the last time someone acted a bit snarky with you at the supermarket or on line at the local bank. Have you replayed a moment like that in your mind wishing you had said something clever? Well, one of my secondary characters in my manuscript Paradox, his name is Razor, always has a wry remark ready. Yes, and I grit my teeth and shake my fist every time he says the clever line that’s never discharged from my mouth.
Do I Live vicariously through my characters?
YES, yes, yes. I admit it. With no shame or guilt. My characters accomplish all the things that I never could. They lead exciting lives traveling the world, sipping on the finest champagne, making love to the most beautiful women, and most importantly; overcoming every obstacle. And trust me, I make it hard for them!
Andrew Duran the mysterious fugitive with the secretive past; skilled in combat and in bed. Veyda the unselfish warrior determined to save mankind, ready to sacrifice her own happiness to save the world. These guys are filled with such passion. Theirs lives are extraordinary.
So, I admit my characters bring excitement to my life. And why not? They are the most interesting people I know.
Do you live through vicariously through your characters?
Hello, as a new member to the blogging world, I ask myself is this platform useful for an unpublished writer. Having read varying opinions about this, I will offer a few random thoughts about the subject.
First, what negatives can come from blogging (other than carpal tunnel syndrome)? Not knowing how to effectively manage one’s time can be a major setback. Blogging your life away when you could be editing your manuscript, writing the next chapter, or improving your query appears to be the greatest danger. Too many people get caught up in social media and forget the priorities in their lives. If your goal is to become a published author, your writing must come before your blog.
Blogging doesn’t necessarily translate into improved book sales for a fiction writer. I have read reports that state blogging is a huge plus for writers of non-fiction, who have a platform to demonstrate their expertise. Their followers will mostly likely be people interested in the subject matter. A fiction writer can post short stories and have a following, but not all of your followers will enjoy the type of fiction you write, thus no guarantee of greater book sales.
What are the positives? Well, I am trying to use my blog as a platform to introduce my characters. I don’t use excerpts from my manuscript, I write about my characters in other periods in their lives; days or years before the time period of the book. My queries will mention my blog and advise literary agents they can learn more about my characters on my blog.
Having this blog has also forced me to think more about my writing and the marketing aspect of the publishing world. We as author need to wear two hats. writer and salesman. And the first thing we need to sell is ourselves. I admit marketing myself and my work has never been my forte. Hopefully, this will help me improve my queries and my self confidence when approaching literary agents. It can’t hurt.
What do you think about blogging helping or hurting your unpublished work?