Five Things I Learned By Studying Men (That The Women In My Life Admired)

When I was a kid my mother told me to study people.  You can learn so much by watching the habits of a winner.  Learn from the mistakes of losers so you don’t make them yourself.

I took this a step further.  I have always paid attention to the men the women in my life admired.


5 – My mother admired Joe Namath. She wasn’t a football fan, but she admired the way Namath guaranteed the New York Jets would win the Super Bowl III and how he backed it up. She always told me a real man kept his word. Men need to be trusted and keeping your word is the best way to earn trust.


4 – My BFF loves a man who can make her laugh. I believe no man should take himself TOO seriously. The ability to make light of oneself is important. Easing the tension in stressful moments can be a gift. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating a man be a clown. No woman admires that. My philosophy has always been if you can’t laugh at yourself, well, you have no right to laugh at anyone else. And a little laughter si always better than a whole lot of stress.


3 – My Ex had to see every Kevin Costner movie that came out. What do women love about Kevin Costner? He portrays sensitive men, but he is always a MAN. A defender of women. Women hate wimpy whiney buffoons. Sure, they want a man to be sensitive to their needs, desires, good listeners, etc, but first and foremost, he needs to still be a man.

dirty dancing 6

2 – My daughter Catherine always had a crush for Johnny Castle (the male protagonist from Dirty Dancing). I think she still does. What can you learn from a fictional character? A whole lot about women. Every woman wants to be with a good man, yet they all admire and desire the bad boy. A little bad boy can also help keep the flames burning hopefully avoiding the dulling of romance.


1 – Allie has a thing for the McDreamy character of Grey’s Anatomy played by Patrick Dempsey. The character Derek Shepherd is a neurosurgeon at a hospital in Seattle. Women appreciate intelligence. They love great conversation. Dumb jocks can be fun, but you have to talk sooner or later. DUH.  Intelligent, charming conversation is important to women.

And these are a few thing I have learned by studying the men the ladies in my life admire.

Thanks for reading.

Have a great weekend.


273 thoughts on “Five Things I Learned By Studying Men (That The Women In My Life Admired)

    1. Smiling. Thank you for saying that. I really think these are traits that women appreciate in men. I’m not saying a man should copy these men, but having an awareness of these traits won’t hurt. Thank you for taking the time out to read and comment. I appreciate it. Have a fantastic week.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. this was very illuminating. I agree with the qualities that the ladies in your life admire and I’d add loyalty as personified by Samwise Gamgee in the LoTR movies. A guy has got to be loyal enough to journey to Mordor with his lady if a ring of power happens to fall into her hands.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Smiling. I am not suggesting men try to copy thse men, but by studying their spouses they can work on their strengths and weaknesses in hopes of becoming a better mate. Thank you for reading and for contributing your thoughts.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Very incisive post.

    My best friend and myself many many years ago would love to go out, spend time and people watch. Its not like we planned on it, but over time we both noticed how each other had the same knack to see what we could learn from people, their actions and the circumstances they face. There’s a plethora to be learned if one just pays attention. Great piece.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. You are so right. You can learn so much by watching people. I am a writer, it helps me make my characters lifelike. And it has taught me to be a better man. Thank you so much for stopping by to read and comment. I appreciate it.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This is a really entertaining post – and I don’t normally read this kind of stuff, so I like it all the more. 🙂 And I think your mum’s advice was really great and I’ll make a point of following it, too… I think it’ll do me good. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It makes sense, doesn;t it. I am not advocating for men to copy other men. But when a man learns what makes his woman happy, he can work on his strength and weaknesses, and perhaps be a better man. Thank you for stopping by to read and comment. I appreciate that. Have a wonderful day full of sunshine and smiles.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Does your site have a contact page? I’m having problems locating it but, I’d like to
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      1. It’s a pleasure and l am well and moving on after the last months and loss of mum my future is become clear and my destiny that God wants me to fulfil also being revealed through the news l read and write .. God Bless and keep you Andrew .. Ian

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Reblogged this on quirkywritingcorner and commented:
    I loved this! Now, I have to stop and think about the men in my life. I like Castle, Don and Charlie Eppes along with their dad (Numbers), and the doc on Saving Hope that sees ghosts whose name I can’t remember. That’s all of can think of off the top of my head. Why? They have all of the same qualities as in the article. ~ Connie


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  7. Wow, this is great! Everything about this piece is wonderful. I admire the way you weave in your personal experiences and apply them to larger more general principles about what women find desirable in men.

    My mother has always liked Denzel Washington. tUsually -especially as of late- Denzel is portrayed as the hero or some type of armed guard. He does this while displaying a sense of confidence. So I think my mother likes him because he symbolizes ultimate patriarch: a man who makes her feel safe from the cold world.


    1. Thank you for reading this post. I had forgotten all about it.

      Seriously, we can learn about what our women want from studying the men they admire. Denzel is a great example of someone who is taking care of loved ones and making them feel safe. Thank you for sharing your example. I appreciate that. Have a wonderful weekend.

      Liked by 1 person

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