Yesterday, I had the pleasure of reading “bad ass” posts from three female bloggers. Those of you who have read my Devil Girl Diaries already know I have a weakness for bad girls.

These ladies (and I won’t say their names to be sure I don’t offend) have inspired me to write a bad boy piece.  This is out of my usual writing comfort zone, but here it goes.  A taste of bad boy Chimp.



This New Yorker is not like other dudes
definitely, not like this latest generation
young punks who can’t pay a restaurant check
cowards looking for courage behind a cell text
I am good and bad and everything in between
I drink my Johnnie Walker straight with no ice
don’t want anything watered down
not my drinks, my words, definitely not my sex

I won’t ask you for a kiss, I will take it
don’t misinterpret me, there will be tenderness
this gentleman will hold the door open for you
and slap your ass as you walk by
don’t like making love, but I love making out
forget beds, don’t need cushion when I’m pushing
I’d introduce you to the floor, shower, and every wall
as we make perspiring memories with a sigh

I love the ladies, have enjoyed quite a few
Superman had kryptonite, I have my weakness too
love legs, feet, lingerie, breasts, and bad ass girls
yeah, I adore the ladies full of badassery
no I won’t flinch like other cowards
love creative women who challenge my brain
if a confident bad ass woman can blow my mind
well then, she may be able to handle the rest of me


Photo of my wife Allie taken Halloween 2014