Tag: editing

A Modern Day Response to the 12 Days of Christmas

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A Modern Day Response to the 12 Days of Christmas

Day 1

Dear True Love,

Thank you for the sweet gift of a partridge in a pear tree. It was romantic and thoughtful. Can’t wait to see you again.

Signed Your Sweetheart

Day 4

Dear True Love,

I am overwhelmed by your boundless generosity. You have given me more than I deserve. I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but please stop. Perhaps, you misunderstood me when you visited. Yes, I love angry birds, but this isn’t what I meant. I don’t have enough room in my humble home for all of these birds.

Signed Your Grateful Sweetheart

Day 12

Dear Moron,

ENOUGH ALREADY! Stop sending me your stupid gifts. I contacted you after the first fours days of Christmas asking you to stop. After all, what was I going to do with all the noisy birds. Then, to make amends, you were thoughtful enough to send me 5 golden rings.

However, on day 6 you started with the freaking birds again.

Now, my house is a total wreck and I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

First, I haven’t slept in days.  Then, on the 11th day of Christmas you sent me the eleven Pipers piping. Those annoying idiots haven’t stopped piping. You make things worse sending 12 Drummers drumming. How is a woman supposed to sleep with all this noise?

With all this music going on the 10 Lords a leaping are hopping all over the place crushing the 4 calling birds, 3 french hens, and 2 turle doves. There is blood, feathers, and bird dropping everywhere.

Then, the Lords a leaping got together with 9 ladies dancings and trust me, the 6 geese aren’t the only ones who are laying.

The 8 Maids a milking splattered milk everywhere. Well, the 9 Ladies dancing slipping. Two crashed into the pear tree knocking off the poor partridge.  Three others fell on the 7 Swans a swimming. And one broke her hip.

My life and house are a disaster. There are 7 law suits currently filed against me. The condo’s Homeowner Association has asked me to vacate the premises immediately.

This is the last correspondence you will be receiving from me. You will be hearing from the police since I requested an order of protection.  And the next letter you receive will be from my attorneys Noel, Noel, & Fitch.

Drop dead.

Signed One Angry Lady

 

Have a wonderful week.

Keep smiling

Keep writing.

chimp xmas 1

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Devil Girl Diaries 6 – (Where Did She Go)

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog73 Comments

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Every man has that one unforgettable woman that will haunt him until his final day; the girl that got away. Allie detested television, vanilla ice cream, and missionary. She explored the depths of her sexuality; while I discovered the heights of my pain. My muse had a nickname. I called her Devil Girl. I write these words to ease my sorrows. My name is Andrew.

This is our story.

the moving train rocked gently

Devil Girl moved back and forth

against the groin that pressed her bottom

causing a smile on construction workers face

I had enough of watching

muscle man and my Allie

do the subterranean lambada

the train pulled into the station

perfect time to move toward them

the doors opened

an elderly woman boarded

I slowly helped her to the nearest seat

my gaze returned to Allie

she was gone

my eyes darted from left to right

pushed through the crowded subway car

where could she be

the train door shut

my heart resembled jungle drums

I glanced out the window

there she was

talking to the construction brute

smiling at his words

nodding as he spoke

her skirt lifting in the air

the train pulled out of the station

into the dark tunnel 

You hurt me Devil Girl

You know the drill; to be continued.

 

Bridge of Broken Dreams

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog138 Comments

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This simple verse is for an unnamed blogger friend dealing with lost love.

 

Bridge of Broken Dreams

Going to the Bridge of Broken Dreams       

to dump your caresses in the river

cause it’s so painful to remember                       

how easily you forgot me                                      

On a mountain I’ll dig the deepest grave

for the crate of empty vows you made

perhaps for you they meant nothing

so buried treasures they’ll be

On the highest cliff I will be standing

When my heart and I finally agree

To toss your photos in the ocean 

’til currents drown your memory

Movies That Inspire Lonely Author

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog117 Comments

Hey, these are movies that make me want to write. Not a list of my favorites.

  1. The Shawshank Redemption
  2. The Sixth Sense
  3. One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest   (Jack)
  4. Benjamin Button
  5. Forrest Gump
  6. Planet of the Apes (Heston’s version inspired me to write Paradox)
  7. The Godfather
  8. The Usual Suspects
  9. Ghost
  10. Titanic
  11. Scent of a Woman
  12. The Green Mile
  13. Field of Dreams (This is not about baseball. It’s about fathers and sons)
  14. It’s a Wonderful Life
  15. The Lion King  (Hakuna Matata – Need I say more?)
  16. The Matrix   (Second movie that inspired me to write Paradox)
  17. Se7en
  18. American Beauty
  19. Training Day
  20. Dirty Dancing  (Nobody puts Baby in a corner)

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Do you like Happy Endings?

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog151 Comments

Minds out of the gutter perverts and pervettes. I am talking about in books and movies.

Closing a book where your hero achieved his goal makes you feel good. And don’t you love leaving the movie theater with a smile on your face?

But it is the shocking ending or tragic ending that is memorable.

For Whom The Bell Tolls, One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, Of Mice and Men, Romeo and Juliet, Gone With The Wind, The Boy In The Striped Pajamas, all classic examples of tragic (memorable) endings in literature.

At the theater who can forget these endings? American Beauty, Titanic, Schindler’s List, The Sixth Sense, Philadelphia, The Green Mile, and the list goes on and on.

Even science fiction has had its share of sad endings. 1984 and the original Planet of the Apes are two examples.

Want to write something unforgettable – you guessed it. Tragic ending.

So, which do you prefer?

Do you like happy endings?

 

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Devil Girl Diaries 5 – (Subway Surprise)

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog86 Comments

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Every man has that one unforgettable woman that will haunt him until his final day; the girl that got away. Allie detested television, vanilla ice cream, and missionary. She explored the depths of her sexuality; while I discovered the heights of my pain. My muse had a nickname. I called her Devil Girl. I write these words to ease my sorrows. My name is Andrew.

This is our story.

 

the 1 train pulled into the station

bringing a wind with it

lifting Devil Girl’s skirt to heaven

exposing her bare derrière

sending my poor heart to hell

so much for the shy girl next door

Allie boarded the train

followed by a horde of men

I entered through another door

she clutched a metal bar

a construction worker stood behind her

she pressed her butt into his groin

his face reacted with surprise

the gentle rocking of the train

did the rest

breathless, angry, confused

I wanted to rip them apart

yet, I wanted to see more

what was wrong with me

she looked over her shoulder

at the brute behind her

he moved closer to her

pushing against her white skirt

rubbing himself against my Allie

I had to stop it

my feet refused to move

my aroused groin betrayed me

what the…..

oh you confuse me Devil Girl

You already know the drill, to be continued.

Devil Girl Diaries 4 – (Subway Madness)

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog88 Comments

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Every man has that one unforgettable woman that will haunt him until his final day; the girl that got away. Allie detested television, vanilla ice cream, and missionary. She explored the depths of her sexuality; while I discovered the heights of my pain. My muse had a nickname. I called her Devil Girl. I write these words to ease my sorrows. My name is Andrew.

This is our story.

 

weeks after the Pandora episode

I found a message upon my desk

the card contained her sweet scent

her note mentioned a time and place

it contained simple instructions                                       

watch, follow,  you don’t know me

 I don’t know you

the rules seemed simple enough                                           

hours later I stood in the crowded train station                                             

she was nowhere to be found                                                                       

a slight parting of the mob                                                                 

revealed my darling angel                                                                                           

 my heart jack hammered against my ribs               

she wore a sheer white blouse                                                                       

that revealed her bra silhouette                                                               

a short beige skater skirt                                                                             

beige high heels that looked well standing up

and just as sweet  in the air                                                          

reaching for the stars  

knowing Allie, panties were optional                                                          

the men around her stole discreet glances

what a silly game she played                                                                                 

a subway slowly pulled into the station                                                                

bringing a slight breeze with it

my throat went desert dry                                        

her fluttering skirt defied gravity                                                  

revealing her perverted plans and more                         

what are you doing Devil Girl

To be continued next Saturday

Jessie

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog163 Comments

Normally, I try to post a poem on Thursday, however due to the holiday, I will post one today.

 

Jessie

They buried Jessie’s older brother today

he just finished turning five

she never had a toy, tv, or internet

yet she’s grateful to be alive

her brother taught her one through ten

by counting her fragile ribs

now she smiles when her stomach growls

as Mama feeds the newborn in the crib

Jessie runs barefoot down a dirt road

in a tattered dress of white

with baby fed, Mama has only one concern

will Jessie eat tonight

According to the United Nations World Food Programme statistics, approximately 3.1 million children under the age of five die each year from hunger or poor nutrition.

Jessie

Devil Girl Diaries 3 – (Pandora)

Published on by thelonelyauthorblog71 Comments

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Every man has that one unforgettable woman that will haunt him until his final day; the girl that got away. Allie detested television, vanilla ice cream, and missionary. She explored the depths of her sexuality; while I discovered the heights of my pain. My muse had a nickname. I called her Devil Girl. I write these words to ease my sorrows. My name is Andrew.

This is our story.

shirtless in Allie’s bed

Pandora kissed my broad chest

her hands undid my jeans

my desires slowly got the best of me

how could I be doing this?

Pandora freed me from my denim shackles

clutching me as if she won a proud trophy

she looked back at a dark corner

you didn’t warn me she sighed

a mischievous giggle escaped the darkness

reminding me Allie was there

before I could protest

a warm accomodating mouth devoured me

I moaned, trembled, stroked Pandora’s mane

pushed back on the bed my passions rose

fours hands and two mouths explored me

teasing, caressing, pleasing

Allie is this what you want?

she smiled and whispered

yes, I am your Devil Girl

I coupled with Pandora

hours later exhaustion got the best of me

resting between two sleeping sirens

voluptuous Pandora on my right

Allie in fetal position to my left

I recalled my Christian beliefs

and sighed

what have you done to me Devil Girl

Happy Saturday. More next week.

x